JE#7

One of the strongest beliefs that were instilled in me from my Catholic religion was the fact that I had to be straight and the one that I was a sinner. I was taught that by my mere existence, I was already guilty of the original sin. I had to repent and confess every single thing that I did wrong, in order to gain passage to the afterlife without the guarantee that I’d go to heaven. I do however find the aspects of love and compassion to be some that really resonated with me. I feel like the colonized mindset is the longest lasting legacy of the colonial period. This mindset of course includes religion. One of the toughest things that I’ve had to come to terms with is my identity as queer. This was a tough one because I felt the need to conform to being straight because I wanted to go to heaven with my parents. I have yet to reconcile my contractions within myself regarding my religious beliefs and my sexuality. For starters, I have moved away from my catholic roots and become more secular in that regard. I do however still attend church services for funerals and some holidays. I guess I’d call that a critical cultural Catholic. Like I mentioned this is not struggle that is over, but rather one that is beginning.