JE#7: Religious Borders

I have a religious border within myself because I am not Catholic like my mother or the rest of my family but I was raised Catholic. I could never understand how they could believe in God when they live miserable lives. My mother may say she is Catholic but she is critical of her religious upbringing. She married my father in Catholic Church and did everything “right” according to her religion. She had my sisters, brother, and I in wedlock; took us to church for our baptisms, first communions; and raised us. Yet, the church will not accept her divorce and my father continues to use Catholicism as his honorable trait. My father divorced my mother when I was ten and I was glad to see my mother liberated from his oppression. Rosa and I look at our mothers as warnings of what could happen to us if we do not defend ourselves and take control of our lives. Both our mothers worry that will end up like them and want us to find respectable men. My mother does not force her religion on me because she has seen how men can use it to oppress women. Thus, I am not Catholic but I struggle to feel connected to my extremely religious family. Even if my mother does not force her religion on me she still harbors resentment that I have completely abandoned it. This is one aspect that I will not allow to colonize me. I will not uphold a religion brought by my Spanish colonizers. Unfortunately, this is a border I will keep so I may find my own destiny.